Pants

Who wears the pants in the relationship? A metaphor that I, for one, could totally do without.  But, no one asked me and this week Eonline and Taylor Swift used this tired metaphor to talk about Swift's dominance as a business woman but her desire to be equal in a relationship: "Taylor Swift may wear the pants in the music industry, but when it comes to relationships, the superstar doesn't like to take control."

While stating equality values is good, I'm not sure why it's a "confession" that she would like an equal in her relationship.  It seems to me that most girls and women might say something to that affect these days, even if the reality is less than equal once they are actually partnered.

What seemed more confusing was Taylor's insistence that while she may be all powerful in her business, she certainly doesn't want to transfer that to her relationship.  Why not? It's a great thing to not control your partner, but an equal partnership doesn't involve "handing over the reins."

"It's wonderful to hand over the reins to your boyfriend when you control so much of these big, high-pressure decisions, you know? That is a huge defining factor in who you choose to be with."

It is interesting to note that she feels like she has the power to hand something over in the first place.  I guess that's a change. But, is it real, or is that an illusion?

And, what is it with the pants? Eonline quoted Taylor as stating, "If I feel too much like I'm wearing the pants, I start to feel uncomfortable and then we break up....relationships are the ultimate collaboration."  What does that mean these days, to wear the pants?  Rather than outdated metaphors, I'd be much more interested in hearing what Taylor thinks is an equal partnership. That would be a powerful message to send to her young fans. Instead, they're getting the advice that it's okay to be powerful and successful in business, but just make sure you're not too powerful in your relationship.